How to get your ex back
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 22, 2010 - 7:00 am
Be honest…
As the holidays approach are you:
- Thinking about going back to your ex?
- Considering forgiving past betrayals, past lies, past deceits, past disappointments, past cheating, because you are afraid of being single and alone?
Don’t do it!
Just because you’re alone doesn’t mean you will be alone forever.
Don’t be fooled into thinking you have to accept less than you deserve from someone in your past because your future relationship hasn’t showed up yet. When someone lies or betrays you, they are showing you a lack of character and also a lack of love and respect for you.
So rather than forgive them and continue moving into a relationship with them, take a step back and ask yourself what you truly deserve.
You don’t have to make it work with somebody because you have a history together.
You also don’t have to make it work with somebody because they were the love of your life.
Sometimes relationships end. Give yourself permission to walk away and move on. You can heal your heart by the holidays but you must stop going backwards. You must stop reconnecting to your ex. Instead, you must do something different to get a different result.
Starting today!
For more tips on how to get over your ex and move on by the new year, enroll in my 30 Day Get Out There Challenge for Singles.
You can also pick up one of my 3 books, depending on where you are on the journey way from Mr. Wrong and towards Mr. Right:
It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good!
If He’s Not The One, Who Is?: What Went Wrong – and What It Takes to Find Mr. Right
Woohoo Women of the Year Event Celebrates Women in Business with a Focus on Paying it Forward
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 21, 2010 - 7:46 pm
On Tuesday, November 30, 2010, 50 women business owners from around the country will gather at the first annual Woohoo Women of the Year event in Hollywood.
Hosted by best selling author, media personality, and CEO of Woohoo, Inc. Lisa Steadman, the event not only celebrates the leadership and passion of the 50 Woohoo Women in attendance. It also celebrates the hard work of women around the world. 50% of each ticket sold will be deposited into the Woohoo Women Lending Fund on Kiva.org, which helps fund women-owned businesses across the globe.
“By coming to the event and celebrating your own success, you actually uplift and uplevel the 49 other women in attendance AND help women around the world for years to come,” Lisa says, which was one of the reasons she created the Woohoo Women of the Year event. “I know so many incredible women who are in business for themselves. And they do amazing work on a daily basis to make a difference in the world. Often these same women don’t take the time to acknowledge their efforts, and instead are far too focused on what’s left on their To Do list. If we don’t celebrate the success we’ve already had, how can we make room for more?”
So what exactly is a Woohoo Woman? According to Lisa, all Woohoo Women possess 3 important qualities.
“First, a Woohoo Woman is living a life of her own design, or paving the way to live life according to her own rules. Even if she’s in the aspirational phase of her journey, she’s creating a vision for herself and getting ready to take her big leap. Second, a Woohoo Woman appreciates being part of a community of like minded women who support and celebrate one another, and mentor each other to success. Finally, a Woohoo Woman is interested in and available to uplift and uplevel herself and others.”
The event will take place at Gary Arabia’s Restaurant on The Lot in Hollywood from 6:30-10pm. Guests will enjoy strutting their stuff down the red carpet while being photographed by celebrated photographer Moriah Diamond, drink signature Woohoo!-tinis, and sample an incredible selection of Gary Arabia’s culinary creations, all while mingling with 50 of the most conscious women in business.
Event sponsors include Woohoo, Inc. Klean Spa, Om Aroma, Dhana, Inc., and Marketing Makes Me Smile.
If you’d like to join the circle of Woohoo Women who are stepping forward and celebrating their brilliance in a bold way while helping other Woohoo Women around the world, Lisa invites you to join her at Woohoo Women of the Year. To purchase your ticket, visit http://woohoowomenoftheyear.com/.
Tis the Season to…Pamper Yourself!
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on - 7:00 am
In the past, did you put a lot of time, energy, emotion, and money into loving, nurturing, and helping your ex feel better about himself?
And he’s gone, are you feeling direction-less?
Now’s the time to pour all of that great energy into yourself.
This holiday season, you have a conscious choice to make.
You can either focus on who’s missing and who you’re not buying presents for…
Or you can take that energy and splurge on yourself!
Maybe you’ll splurge on a spa day.
Maybe you’ll take the money you were going to spend on your ex and put it in the bank, save it, and put it towards buying your first property in 2010.
Now’s the time to treat yourself with excellent self love and self care throughout the holiday season.
Take time this holiday season to step back, love yourself, honor yourself, and pamper yourself.
For more tips on how to celebrate being single and ready to mingle this holiday season and into 2011, enroll in my 30 Day Get Out There Challenge for Singles.
You can also pick up one of my 3 books, depending on where you are on the journey way from Mr. Wrong and towards Mr. Right:
It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good!
If He’s Not The One, Who Is?: What Went Wrong – and What It Takes to Find Mr. Right
Can you really be friends with your ex?
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 20, 2010 - 6:00 am
Can we be friends?
After a breakup, this simple question can weigh heavy on your mind. As a heartbreak reinvention coach, I often hear this question from clients. And my answer is always the same — no. Why? Because as hard as it may be to accept, your relationship is over. This person is now your ex. The relationship ended for a reason. It’s now time to EXtract your ex from your life, give yourself time to heal, and find the space to move on. Most people who try to stay friends with their ex are just doing so in hopes of either rekindling the relationship or using the other person as a crutch until someone better comes along. What happens when it’s the other person who moves on first? Ouch!
Of course, there are certain circumstances in which you can’t avoid maintaining a relationship with your ex, but for now, the following is a cheat sheet on appropriate ways of communicating with your ex after the Big Breakup.
By Phone
The reasons for talking to your ex on the phone are…wait. There are none. Delete his number from your cell phone. And if he leaves you a message, listen to it only once in case your million-dollar check from Publishers Clearing House somehow ended up at his address. Then delete immediately and move on.
Via Email, IM, Text Messaging, Facebook
After you’ve arranged to return each other’s stuff, delete your ex from your email address book, your Facebook friends, and your instant messaging contacts. That way when you’re having a fragile moment at three A.M., you’re not tempted to contact him. (The repercussions the following day can be both embarrassing and costly to your recovery). And if you were hoping to keep tabs on your ex by tracking his every online move or possible new dating adventures via his Tweets? Don’t do it. It’ll just make you wonder who he’s talking to (or obsess about those girls who keep leaving him flirty @ replies), and you don’t need that. Delete him from all of your social networking sites immediately.
In Person
And because there are just too many emotions swirling around in your post-breakup head, you should avoid seeing your ex in person at all costs. If you see your ex too soon, you run the risk of suffering potentially bad consequences, like maybe these including any or all of the following:…
1. Losing face by crying hysterically
2. Waking up beside him the next morning and realizing you just had sex with your ex
3. Getting arrested for assault and battery
Let’s face it. None of these situations are is ideal. So if you can, avoid seeing your ex until your emotions are more stable. Only you can determine when that will be (and it’s okay to say never!).
Breaking up is never easy. And staying connected to your ex only makes it more challenging. By following the ex etiquette I’ve outlined above, you accelerate your healing heart and guarantee a happier ending in your future.
Have you stayed friends with your ex? Share your experience by leaving a comment.
And to fully exorcise your ex, start reading It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good!, or embark on your 21 day ex b.f. detox with the workbook It’s a Breakup, Not a Breakdown Workbook: A 21-Day Action Plan to Plot Your Revenge, Spoil Yourself, and Find Out How Good Your Life Is Without Him.
Why Men Cheat During the Holidays
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 19, 2010 - 7:00 am
With the holidays upon us, has your To Do list become a mile long? From buying and wrapping presents to scheduling family festivities and travel to finishing up those year-end projects at the office, it’s no wonder that romance falls off the radar! It’s also no surprise when you hear of a man cheating during the holiday season. What causes this rise in infidelity? Is it libido, ego, or, gulp, is it us?
The following are some of the most common reasons men cheat during the holidays…
1. He doesn’t like the way he’s being treated
Oftentimes, a man cheats because he doesn’t like the dynamic in his current relationship. If he feels like his partner nags him, belittles him, disrespects him, and/or treats him like a child, meeting someone new who treats him with respect, admiration, and with desire will feel incredibly appealing. So what does that have to do with the holidays? With the added stress of that long To Do list, some women may be unconsciously treating their man like he’s yet another thing they have to cross off their list, but they just don’t have time for. And honestly, who wants to be treated that way?
No one! To avoid driving your partner away, spend time every day nurturing your relationship. And not just during the holiday season. All year long, let your partner know how much you love and appreciate him. Ask for the same in return. By being treated the way you want to be treated and ultimately treating your partner with love and respect, you take an important step in affair-proofing your relationship.
2. He feels ignored/unappreciated
Like it or not, men are wired differently than women. It’s that whole Mars/Venus thing. So when a woman’s attention is diverted by holiday shopping, decorating the home, and/or dealing with party planning and family visits, a man can feel completely ignored and unappreciated. Of course, his first response should be to talk to his partner about how he’s feeling. But again, men are wired differently. Asking to have his needs met can make a man feel weak. Instead, he may look outside the relationship. This is where problems may arise. Instead of summoning his inner strength and asking for love, attention, and/or validation from his partner, a man is much more comfortable seeking these things from another woman. At first, this new woman may only be an emotional confidante. However, over time this female friend may stir up other needs. That’s when a man is likely to initiate physical intimacy. To avoid this danger zone, it’s important to maintain open lines of communication between you and your partner. If and when these feelings of dissatisfaction or hurt surface (during the holidays or any time of year), your man should feel free to discuss them with you, thus eliminating his need for outside emotional companionship.
3. He’s unhappy and the holidays remind him of what’s missing
The holidays are a time when everyone — both men and women — take stock of their lives. If the year has been good, you’re likely to feel good about the holidays. However, if the year has been difficult, challenging, and/or unsatisfying in terms of career, health, family, finances, and/or relationships, the holiday season may bring on added stress or a deeper level of unhappiness. If he feels like he can’t talk to his partner about this dissatisfaction, a man may look elsewhere for solace. To avoid getting into the dangerous scenario of your partner seeking comfort from another female, it’s once again important to keep those lines of communication open. Even if your year has been stressful — from finance to romance — let your partner know it’s safe for him to express himself about any and all issues. Even if you disagree, give him a secure space to share how he’s feeling. And don’t argue or chastise him for what he says or how he feels. Instead, listen, validate, and let him know he’s been heard. Above all else, it’s important to realize that a difficult year doesn’t have to end in infidelity. Instead, these trying times can bring two people closer, if you’re both willing to be vulnerable, honest, and work together rather than against one another.
4. He’s bored
Mistletoe, tree trimming, sipping hot cider or egg nog? Let’s face it. All those things that make the holidays fun and exciting for you may just bore your partner to tears. And while that’s no excuse for cheating, infidelity happens. However, this particular relationship rut can be easily remedied. Find out what floats your partner’s boat when it comes to the holiday season. See if he’s got any festive fantasies you can indulge in. By nurturing the novelty of the season together, finding traditions you can both get excited about, and making holiday plans you both enjoy, you’ll not only affair-proof your relationship, but find meaningful ways to deepen your bond during the holiday season and beyond.
Ultimately, the reasons a man cheats during the holidays are the same reasons he’ll cheat any time of year. By keeping a relationship healthy all year long, you remove the risk of your partner cheating, and enjoy the fruits of a successful partnership. If or when you see signs your man might be straying, talk to him. See what’s going on. Together, work to make your relationship affair-proof — during the holidays AND throughout the year.
4 Common Mistakes Single Women Make
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 18, 2010 - 7:32 am
As the holidays approach, are you left wondering why you haven’t met Mr. Right this year? I’ve been talking to a lot of single women about how to STOP making the same mistakes over and over and instead get love right in 2011.
To help YOU rock your dating life in the near year, here are the most common mistakes I see single women making. See which ones you’re committing:
Mistake #1: They Allow Work to Consume Them
Be honest. Are you consumed by your work? When you meet someone, do you do your best to push him away? As a coach, this is a common mistake I see single women make. So many women are so committed to the idea that if a man is interested in them, there must be something wrong with him, that they dismiss potentially really great guys without giving them a chance. And then they re-immerse themselves in work mode, staying in masculine energy that makes them not only hard to approach but practically impossible to connect with.
Mistake #2: They Believe Time Has Run Out
Think time has run out on your chance to have love, marriage, and babies? You’re wrong. While it may have been true that once upon a time love, marriage, and babies had a predictable timeline, in 2010 our lives are less predictable. And that’s a good thing. As many women are delaying marriage until our 40s and 50s, the truth is we are never behind schedule. We’re right on time for our lives. And yes, I understand the biology isn’t always on our side. But if you truly want to have a family, not being able to bear your own children shouldn’t be the deal breaker. You can adopt, hire a surrogate, be a foster parent, or even a step parent to your future partner’s children.
Mistake #3: They Ignore Good Men
I see this time and time again. When a woman believes that there are no good men available, all she sees is proof that she’s right. I invite every woman who believes that all the good ones are taken to let go of her need to be right and instead step in to the desire to be happy. The truth is, there are good men everywhere. Not all of them are available. Not all of them are interested. And you’re not interested in all of them. However, by acknowledging and celebrating these good men, even if they simply open a door for you, let you ahead of them in line at the grocery store, or compliment you on your perfume, this is an opportunity to recognize a good man. When you start celebrating the good men you interact with every day, and lighten up on your need to be right about your belief that there are no good single men left, you will change who you attract. In the process, you can attract somebody pretty fabulous.
Mistake #4: They Run The Other Way
Time and time again, I see single women asking for a good guy to show up. And then when he does, they have the urge to run the other way. This is actually perfectly natural. If all a woman has ever experienced in her dating life is frustration, disappointment, and lack of emotional availability, then that’s what she’s used to. However, if she wants a different dating result, she’s got to change her behavior. As initially uncomfortable as receiving interest, adoration, and genuine connection with a good man can feel when you’ve never felt it before, now’s the time to get uncomfortable. Let yourself experience a different dating result. That’s what you’ve asked for. Celebrate what you’ve manifested, move through the discomfort, and into the pure enjoyment of getting to know someone truly amazing who’s truly interested in getting to know you.
When it comes to creating a life you love and attracting the love of your life, the key lies in getting really clear about how you may have sabotaged your success in the past. Once you acknowledge how you may have contributed to past disappointment and drama, you can change your behavior. With that simple act, you can create new beliefs and behavior and ultimately enjoy different (and better) results.
To start celebrating being single and ready to mingle this holiday season and meet Mr. Right in record time, enroll in my 30 Day Get Out There Challenge for Singles.
You can also pick up one of my 3 books, depending on where you are on the journey way from Mr. Wrong and towards Mr. Right:
It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good!
If He’s Not The One, Who Is?: What Went Wrong – and What It Takes to Find Mr. Right
When will you unleash your ROAR?
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 17, 2010 - 7:00 am
I’ve got a question for you. Are you playing it safe?
Are you living small, playing by the rules, and in general, tiptoeing through your life?
If so, how’s that working for you?
More importantly, how’s that NOT working for you?
How has playing by the rules kept you stuck, limited, and unsatisfied?
How have you squelched the authentic part of you that wants more, dreams bigger, and believes in possibility?
Maybe playing it safe has kept you in unsatisfying relationship after unsatisfying relationship.
Maybe living small has kept you from pursuing your dreams, taking a risk, and stepping outside your comfort zone, all necessary requirements for living your dream life.
I see it time after time. Women choosing to play it safe because they don’t know how to unleash their ROAR.
Women settling for less than they deserve in life and love because they’re too afraid to open their mouths and ROAR.
Are you one of them?
And if so, when will you unleash your ROAR?
What’s it going to take for you to step up to your Remarkable Openness to Awakening and Reinvention?
That’s really what I’m talking about. When you ROAR, you’re really…
- Awakening to what’s possible
- Opening up to making change and getting better results
- Summoning the inner strength to reinvent in the face of fear and uncertainty
If you ask me, the time is now. You’ve played it small long enough. And look what it’s gotten you…
- Mediocre relationships
- A so-so life
- Heartbreak after heartbreak
- The general feeling that you’re not living your best life
So again, I want to know…
What’s it going to take for you to unleash your ROAR?
As someone who has had her fair share of life’s ups and downs, faced reinvention time after time, and constantly challenges herself to ROAR, I want to help you.
I want to help you unleash your ROAR!
Sounds scary? It’s not. In fact, it’s freeing, fabulous, and fun! And it starts with a simple and profound baby step.
It starts with committing to your ROAR right this minute.
Again, I ask…
What’s it going to take for you to unleash your ROAR?
What’s it going to take for you to let go of the never ending cycle of:
- Mediocre relationships
- A so-so life
- Heartbreak after heartbreak
- The general feeling that you’re not living your best life
And instead embrace what’s possible including:
- Healing your heart and attracting the love of your life
- Living life on a grander scale, fully committed to your most authentic self
- Breaking free of all limiting beliefs and self sabotaging behaviors to live your dream life
This is such an exciting time for you.
I can’t wait for you to unleash your ROAR!
Post your ROAR experiences here.
How to Beat The Holiday Blues BEFORE Thanksgiving
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 16, 2010 - 7:00 am
As the holidays approach, it’s all too easy for a single gal to start feeling sorry for herself. Frustrated that yet another year went by without meeting Mr. Right, you can start to feel like the entire year was a big fat waste of your time. But the truth is, you’ve got plenty to celebrate this holiday season. So before you start feeling sorry for yourself, instead start celebrating your fab single self. Here’s how:
Single Strategy #1: Focus on friends and family
Instead of obsessing about what went wrong with your ex or why you didn’t meet the love of your life this year, focus your energy and attention this holiday season on your friends and family. You are loved by many people! You may just need to tweak your perspective. Take some time to reconnect with old friends, tell a family member how much you love them, and in turn heal your broken heart.
Single Strategy #2: Pamper yourself
Think of all the money you’re saving by being single this holiday season! No ungrateful ex to shop for, no annoying in-laws to visit, no ridiculous lovers’ spats after one too many cups of eggnog. This holiday season, celebrate your single status by pampering yourself. Spend a day at the spa. Splurge a little on gifts for yourself. Decorate your home to your heart’s content. Whatever floats your boat, you’re footloose and fancy free to do it!
Single Strategy #3: Reserve the right to say “None of your bees-wax”
Nosey relatives asking too many questions about What went wrong? Well-meaning but intrusive friends trying to tell you what to do to find love? This holiday season, your single status is nobody’s business but your own. So when someone sidles up to you with a gossip gleam in their eye and asks, “So where’s What’s His Name?” reserve the right to protect your healing heart. Simply smile and say, “None of your business.” Or, if you’re so inclined, choose a more radical response, i.e. “I shipped him off to Afghanistan for the new year,” or “He’s contemplating his bad behavior from behind ex-boyfriend bars.”
Single Strategy #4: Become your own arm candy
Stressed about going to holiday parties alone? Instead of fretting about all those outings by yourself, celebrate being single by being your own arm candy! Before going to the party, stop by the mall makeup counter and get a professional makeover. Wear that saucy red dress and stiletto boots. (Or if you’re a guy, invest in that cologne that makes women weak at the knees, or buy a new sweater or blazer that makes you feel like the hunk o’ man you are). Then walk into the party like you own the room. Go ahead – give yourself permission to be your own arm candy!
Single Strategy #5: Give yourself permission to celebrate your slump
There will be times this holiday season when you won’t feel like celebrating. Times when you will want to mourn the loss of your past relationship or feel sorry for yourself for still being single. And that’s okay. Give yourself permission to turn down a party invitation or two in favor of curling up with a good book, a glass of wine, or your favorite sappy movie in your pajamas at home. This is your life – feel it, celebrate it, let it go!
What do you think about these 5 tips? Share your comments here on my blog.
Ready to rock your love life this holiday season? Enroll in my FREE 30 Day Get Out There Challenge.
Need hands on help fighting the holiday blues? Pick up a copy of my books It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good! or If He’s Not The One, Who Is?: What Went Wrong – and What It Takes to Find Mr. Right.
Ready to manifest Mr. Right? Grab your copy of my new e-book How to Meet Your Husband: Unlock the 5 Essential Secrets to STOP Attracting Jerks, Get Out Of Your Dating Desert, and Manifest Mr. Right.
Marriage. Defined.
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 15, 2010 - 6:39 am
For the last 6 years, I’ve been writing books about breakups, dating, and relationships. I’ve also coached women who want to reinvent their love future, and talked to thousands more about how to heal their hearts and find true love.
And what I hear over and over again is…“I want to meet my husband. I’m ready to get married!”
While I know these women genuinely mean what they say, I also know that if all they really wanted was to GET MARRIED, they would be married already. Or at least married by tomorrow.
YOU COULD BE MARRIED TOMORROW.
Would it last? Probably not. Would you be happy? Not necessarily. But if a woman just wants to be married – if you really just want to be married — she can find some guy to marry her.
You can find some guy to marry you today.
The truth is, you don’t just want to be married.
I believe what you really want – what most single women want – is to find YOUR beautiful, blissful, unique happily ever after story.
You want to fall madly in love with Mr. Right. And vice versa.
Why wouldn’t you want that?
Every person on the planet deserves to find healthy and happy love with their perfect partner.
There’s just one problem. A lot of single women do not have all the tools they need to get love right.
You may not have all the tools you need to get love right.
I know I didn’t when I was single.
Once upon a time, I repeatedly got love WRONG.
I chose the wrong men.
I didn’t know my own needs, let alone how to communicate my own needs to my partner.
I let my emotional baggage rule my relationships. And as a result, my relationships suffered under the tremendous weight of my baggage.
I wasn’t the only one coming to the relationship with unhealthy habits, beliefs, and patterns. My partners weren’t exactly poster children for healthy and happy men. And why would they be?
If like attracts like — and it does — I was always attracting my emotional equal. Ay-ay-ay!
You will, too. And that’s why it’s essential to get as healthy and happy with yourself and your own life before becoming somebody’s wife.
Before settling down with someone, you’ll want to make peace with yourself, your issues, and any baggage you haven’t already healed.
The truth is, nobody can fix you, save you, rescue you, or heal you. That is, no one but Y-O-U.
So if you’re stuck in a fantasy that Prince Charming is going to come along and save you from your miserable life, do yourself a huge favor and rescue yourself. Even if you don’t agree with what I just said, please keep reading. Your future marriage depends on it.
Let me repeat that. If you’re stuck in a fantasy that Prince Charming is going to come along and save you from your miserable life by marrying you, do yourself a huge favor and rescue yourself, starting right now.
Speaking of, now is the perfect time to get real about marriage.
Notice I said marriage, not how to meet your husband.
I find that most women are so focused on meeting their husband and having a beautiful wedding that they forget all about the marriage that follows the wedding. And this is a huge mistake.
A wedding is one day out of your long life. Marriage is a long term commitment that takes time, energy, attention, and commitment.
Take it from someone who’s happily married. Marriage takes work. And to enjoy it, you better like the guy. Not only that, you better have done enough personal work on yourself to NOT be carrying around a truckload of baggage that’s going to squash your relationship.
And you better be willing to love a man who’s imperfect.
You also better be willing to be vulnerable. To reveal yourself, warts and all, to your partner. To be seen and heard at your best and your worst. And to love a man at his best and his worst.
Oh, and one more thing: You better be willing to give up other men. That may sound like a no brainer, but hear me out. Monogamy is a choice. And temptation is a bitch. When you’re married, flirting with other men on occasion can be fun. But it ends at flirting. You won’t know how infuriating this is until you meet a man who makes you melt and all you can do is walk away and remind yourself that you have a husband.
Be prepared: After you find Prince Charming, he will turn into a mere mortal man. And you’ll be stuck with his sweet, snoring, sometimes stinky, sometimes boring self. That, my friend, is the unglamorous, unselfish, rarely talked about truth about marriage. Period.
Of course, there’s an upside, too.
In loving a mere mortal man, you give yourself the opportunity to be loved. Truly, madly, deeply loved. To become family. To merge lives so completely that you can’t imagine your life without the other person. And that is worth putting up with snoring, stinkiness, and the occasional bout with boredom.
I’ll be honest. My husband grinds his teeth in his sleep. He plays video games sometimes. And on Saturday nights, you’ll usually find us parked on the couch watching movies.
But guess what else comes with this extraordinary man?
He cooks amazing, delicious, flavorful dinners for me every night. He likes to snuggle. He’s always saving for the future. He takes me to Paris every 2 years. He throws an annual fundraising dinner for a charity he chooses. He supports me and my goals, dreams, and grand life vision. He meets my emotional needs, thinks I’m low maintenance, and always holds me when I cry. Plus, he’s the most amazing kisser I’ve ever met. And he goes downtown like a champ. Yes, you read that last part right.
For me, there’s no contest. I clearly married the right man. For me.
I want YOU to marry the right man, too. For you.
Before you’ll know who’s right for you, it may be easier to recognize who’s wrong for you. So let’s start there.
In the wrong relationship, you’ll feel compromised. Dissatisfied. Frustrated. Alone.
You won’t feel heard, appreciated, or understood.
And you’ll long for your single days.
Doesn’t sound like a lot of fun, does it? Having been in relationships like that, I can tell you. It’s not.
On the other hand, in the right relationship, you’ll be happy. Fulfilled. Secure. Excited about the future.
In the right relationship, you and your husband will inspire one another to be better people. Your dreams will flourish. Your goals will be met. And together, you’ll celebrate all of these successes with joy and appreciation.
Here’s something else to keep in mind. While you may have a certain vision of who your husband is and what he looks like, be willing to be wrong. Be willing to reinvent what he looks like because of how he makes you feel. And be willing to meet someone you never thought would be your type, but who can actually rock your world AND be your rock.
Before you can meet Mr. Right, you need to become absolutely, positively sure about what you’re looking to attract into your life.
Do you simply want to get have a big, fat wedding and be married?
Or are you looking for YOUR happily ever after with the perfect partner for YOU?
These are 2 very different goals. Neither one is wrong. I just want you to choose so we can proceed with clarity.
The truth is, in the right relationship with the right man, marriage may or may not happen. And you’ll STILL be happy.
In the wrong relationship, even if you DO marry, you will be miserable.
Again, the choice is yours. Make your choice clearly and consciously. This is the first step to finding the kind of love you desire and deserve.
For more tips on how to become a man magnet, enroll in my 30 Day Get Out There Challenge for Singles.
You can also pick up my e-book How to Meet Your Husband: Unlock the 5 Essential Secrets to STOP Attracting Jerks, Get Out Of Your Dating Desert, and Manifest Mr. Right.
How to handle the post-breakup game of 20 questions
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on November 14, 2010 - 7:33 am
After a breakup, you may find yourself inundated with questions, concerns, and issues from friends, family, and in-laws including:
“What went wrong?”
“Why did you leave?”
“Can’t you work it out?”
Instead of feeling the need to explain yourself, put healthy boundaries in place. Honor what’s best for YOU. Don’t worry about how others are handling the breakup. This is your chance to heal and move on. Don’t buy into guilt trips or 20 questions.
And when necessary, give yourself permission to say, “It’s really none of your business.”
For more tips on how to heal your heart in record time, check out all my FREE breakup rx tips on my blog.
You can also pick up one of my 3 books, depending on where you are on the journey way from Mr. Wrong and towards Mr. Right:
It’s A Breakup Not A Breakdown: Get over the big one and change your life – for good!
If He’s Not The One, Who Is?: What Went Wrong – and What It Takes to Find Mr. Right
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