Dating Tip of the Week: Be Clear About What You Want
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on April 9, 2008 - 1:12 pm
In order to enjoy your fabulous single life, it’s important to get clear about what you want in the relationship department. Do you:
– want to attract your perfect partner and settle down, get married, have children?
– want to play the field, dating multiple people until you find someone you’re interested in committing to?
– want to take a break from dating to focus on yourself?
Regardless of what your current relationship goal is, it’s important to be clear about it. Then, it’s important to take steps towards your goal. For instance, if you want to find your perfect partner and settle down, then you’re going to have to put some energy into that pursuit. He’s not just going to show up on your doorstep, after all. And if he did, you’d think he was a stalker and not open the door! So, make a list of the qualities you’re looking for in a potential partner. Make sure you know the difference between requirements and wants versus needs. Then put yourself out there as often as possible. Start online dating. Enlist the help of friends, a matchmaker, singles events, etc. Make sure you spend time every day committed to your goal.
The same goes true if you want to play the field. You may have to mix up your routine, i.e. stop spending all your time at work or at home. Recruit your friends and go out once a week in a target rich environment. Use online dating as one of your many sources for meeting people. You, too may want to enlist the help of friends and singles events. Do whatever is necessary to get out of your own way, and regularly meet people to date. And remember, just have fun!
Now, if you want to take a break from dating, do it. Take your online profile down so people don’t contact you. Then focus your energy and efforts on whenever it is you’d rather be doing than dating. Taking time away from dating can be incredibly healthy and empowering. And when you’re ready, get back in the game. Only you will know when that time is right.
Good luck and happy dating!
Breakup Tip of the Week: Clean House, A.K.A. Get Rid of Your Ex’s Stuff
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on April 7, 2008 - 8:20 am
Whether you just broke up or are in week 10 of your breakup, the following tip is going to help you heal and move on. It’s time to get rid of your ex’s stuff. And I mean everything.
Now is the time to take a clean sweep of your home, removing any remaining evidence that your ex existed. From their coffee mug to their shampoo that’s still in your shower caddy to their T-shirt that you’re still sleeping in, to the photos of the two of you in happier times that still litter your home, now is the time to collect these items, put them in a box, and either toss them, donate them, or give them to a friend for safekeeping until you’ve healed enough so that the mere presence of them doesn’t send you into a dark depression.
If you lived with your ex, it’s especially important to clean house. If your ex spent a lot of time in your place, it’s also important. If you moved out and moved on, it’s going to be a little easier for you because your ex didn’t inhabit your new home. But regardless, you must clean house. The following tip should help:
If you follow these rules, your breakup recovery will be that much smoother. Of course there will still be times when it’s hard. Just remember — when you’re in the middle of all that breakup angst, you’re not having a breakdown. You’re breaking UP so that you can eventually move on.
Good luck and happy healing!
Tonight’s Webinar: 26 Secrets Successful Singles Know!
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on April 3, 2008 - 8:47 am
Did you know that there’s a difference between being single and being a successful single? Join me tonight for this unique webinar where I’ll unlock 26 secrets successful singles know, including:
- Why it’s better to be single than sorry
- How to make the most of every day as a savvy single
- How to quickly and easily handle dating rejection
- How to easily attract the kind of partner you want
- How to play the dating numbers game and play to win!
Dating Tip of the Week: Flirt!
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on - 8:00 am
The play button to listen to the audio:
This week’s dating tip is an exercise in flirtation. As a savvy single, it’s your duty to maximize your personal flirting style and practice, practice, practice! Ready to get started?
First, it’s important to acknowledge that flirting can happen anywhere, at any time, with anyone. From picking out produce (while picking up guys) at the grocery store to making casual conversation while standing in line for your latte to exchanging flirty glances at the dog park, you can — and should -– flirt daily! After all, practice makes perfect and to become a seasoned flirting pro, you should practice often.
Second, it’s equally important to know that flirting doesn’t have to lead anywhere. You can routinely flirt with cute strangers and never give them your name or number. By flirting regularly, you allow yourself to hone your flirting style so that when you do meet someone you’re interested in, you’ll have all the right moves. The result? He’ll ask for your number in no time. Score!
Now that you’re down with the importance of flirting daily, check out some tips to help cultivate your individual flirting style, courtesy of The Savvy Single’s Guide to Life.
Want 25 more successful single strategies? Join my webinar tonight at 6pm Pacific!
The Savvy Single’s Guide to Flirting
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on April 2, 2008 - 8:37 am
Welcome to The Savvy Single’s Guide to Flirting. Whether you’re a natural born lash-batter interested in brushing up on your skills or a novice looking to cultivate your come hither credentials, this is the year to embrace the fine art of flirting. Ready to get your flirt on? Let’s get started!
First, it’s important to acknowledge that flirting can happen anywhere, at any time, with anyone. From picking out produce (while picking up guys) at the grocery store to making casual conversation while standing in line for your latte to exchanging flirty glances at the dog park, you can — and should -– flirt daily! After all, practice makes perfect and to become a seasoned flirting pro, you should practice often.
Second, it’s equally important to know that flirting doesn’t have to lead anywhere. You can routinely flirt with cute strangers and never give them your name or number. By flirting regularly, you allow yourself to hone your flirting style so that when you do meet someone you’re interested in, you’ll have all the right moves. The result? He’ll ask for your number in no time. Score!
Now that you’re down with the importance of flirting daily, here are some tips to help cultivate your individual flirting style:
Be yourself (and always be prepared)
To flirt with confidence, you don’t need to channel Marilyn Monroe. Instead, it’s important to be yourself — your smart, sweet, sexy self, that is! And because flirting can happen anytime and anywhere, a seasoned flirter takes her cue from the Boy Scouts and is always be prepared, not to mention looking her best. That doesn’t mean wearing tons of makeup to the gym or stilettos to the supermarket. No, to be the best version of yourself, you should follow this simple rule: Always leave the house with the appropriate amount of makeup, hair styling, and cute & comfortable clothing for the day ahead of you. That way, if you happen to spot a cute stranger while running your Saturday errands or on the way home from work in the evening, you’re armed and ready to get your fabulous flirt on!
Make the most of your flirting moves
When you do find someone you’d like to flirt with, it’s time to use your best flirting moves. These include making eye contact and then looking away, offering a shy inviting smile, and playing with your hair. If the object of your flirtation approaches, let him do the initial talking and respond with subtle enthusiasm and confidence. Continue to make eye contact and smile. If he says something funny, be sure to laugh. That’s a definite ego boost for any guy who’s brave enough to approach a cute girl! Be sure to give him the occasional compliment to encourage him. Finally, if you’re enjoying the flirt fest and would like him to continue and/or ask for your number, find a reason to touch your guy. If you’re talking and want to emphasize a point, squeeze his arm. If he says something particularly amusing, laugh and lightly touch his hand or leg. These simple flirting moves tell the object of your flirtation that you’re interested, giving him the green light to ask for your number.
Don’t try too hard
Flirting is a subtle sport, and one that should not be played too aggressively. That begins with your appearance. Don’t wear something too provocative (i.e. low cut, too tight, too short, too revealing). It sends the wrong message that you’re not so much flirty as you are, well, easy. That’s actually an important distinction to make – the difference between flirting and being overtly sexual. Flirting should be light, fun, and casual whereas being overtly sexual entails using overly suggestive words and aggressive body language. Don’t make the mistake of trying too hard and being overtly sexual. Instead, relax, have fun, and be fabulously flirty!
Play the game (and play to win!)
Flirting is a game of cat and mouse. Just as you shouldn’t try too hard, you should also NOT do all of the work. Let the object of your flirtation pursue you, too. Make him work a little to get that pat on the arm and/or giggle. If your attention and affection come too easily, he’ll quickly lose interest. Remember, you’re a catch. Play the game by letting him try and catch you.
Leave him wanting more
Even if you’re having the time of your life, always, always, always, leave him wanting more. Cut the conversation or date short, using a variety of vague excuses that’ll make him wish he had just a few more minutes of your fabulous time. Excuse examples include:
“This has been fun but I really have to go.â€
“Look at the time. I should get going.â€
“It’s been great talking to you but I can’t stay any longer.â€
By being just a little bit mysterious, your guy will go out of his way to try and see you again. If he hasn’t already, he’ll definitely ask for your number now that he feels you slipping away. And then it’s up to you whether or not you hand him your digits.
In 2008, the key to flirting lies in being yourself, practicing regularly, and making the most of your finely honed flirting moves. By becoming a seasoned pro, you greatly increase your chances of dating success because you’ve mastered the art of not only how to get a guy’s attention but how to play the game and leave him wanting more. Soon, you’ll be able to charm any prince who strikes your fancy. And in the meantime? Flirt away, Savvy Single!
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