Back to the Game

Submitted by LJMaggie on March 27, 2008 - 8:11 am

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Catch up with contributer LJ Maggie’s ongoing dating saga. It’s a familiar tale…

I decided to give Craigslist guy a chance. He seemed sweet and maybe just needed a boost of confidence, besides he was fun to talk to.  He picked me up and I was a little shocked. Am I wrong, but shouldn’t you dress up for a first date? I know it was just a movie but I was wearing a dressy tank top, jeans and heels. He could have put on a nice shirt. He was wearing a sweatshirt, jeans and tennis shoes. Am I expecting too much?

It was a fun night though most of it we were watching a movie and not talking. We did talk while he was driving me home but there was no spark.

We went out a second time. This time it was dinner, drinks and a midnight movie. Again he wore the same type of outfit. I cut him some slack though because it was a midnight movie and I was wearing black comfy pants, a sweater and UGGS. I don’t normally wear UGGS unless I am back home in the Midwest but a midnight movie requires being comfy. I had also considered him more of a friend. When he dropped me off he did try to kiss me and I moved my face so he kissed my cheek.

Yes I moved my face so he couldn’t kiss me on the lips. I didn’t feel that way about him and didn’t want to give him a false sense of hope. And I should be straightforward and tell him I just want him as a friend but I have done that before and the guy told me it would be to difficult for him. I also have been on the other end of that conversation and it doesn’t feel good.

The whole night got me thinking about attraction and what qualities people are attracted to. My day job consists of occasionally working in a retail store so I get to people watch a lot. Lately I have noticed the strangest couples. Not so much in them acting weird, though this is LA so there are plenty of those. But when you look at the two people, you wonder what attracted one to the other. One is noticeably hotter, thinner, more attractive, or even has more money than the other. And you think to yourself, “Really?” and “No wonder I can’t find a decent guy, all the supermodels are dating them.” Then you start putting yourself down and wondering what you can do to change to get that guy that you think is gorgeous and makes your friends jealous.

And yes I have had a few of those types of guys, and when we met they hit on me, one of them a soap star and was he gorgeous. But then I remember those gorgeous guys weren’t willing to offer me a relationship. And the nice average guys who wanted to, I didn’t feel that spark with.  But then the ones who were both gorgeous and nice I pursued a relationship with and it still didn’t work out.

Can’t I just take qualities from all of the guys I have dated and make a man?

Stay tuned for more…