“How to get published” Webcast replay now available
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on February 28, 2008 - 9:51 pm
In case you missed the webinar on how to take your brilliant idea from inception to published book on Wednesday night, the webcast replay is now available. Enjoy!
I’m off to Mark Victor Hansen’s Mega Book Marketing University this weekend. I’m so excited! I look forward to meeting my fellow attendees as well as the presenters. I’m especially interested in introducing myself to Alex Mandossian, Internet marketing guru, and PR expert Rick Frishman. My agent Sharlene is one of the featured speakers so I can’t wait to see her as well!
Stay tuned — when I return I’ll be chock full of ideas, insights and new directions. WooHoo!
Dating Tip of the Week: Talk to strangers
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on February 27, 2008 - 7:58 am
Click the play button for the podcast:
Calling all savvy singles! Ready for your dating tip of the week? Every day for seven days, your goal is to strike up a conversation with a member of the opposite sex whom you’ve never met. They don’t have to be single, and it doesn’t have to lead anywhere, but this is an exercise in getting comfortable approaching and talking to potential partners. Now, it’s important to exercise good judgment. Don’t approach strangers in a dark parking lot or other unsafe area. Instead, think standing in line at the grocery store, in the elevator at work, while waiting for your latte at Starbucks, or any other place where there are members of the opposite sex present.
Remember, this doesn’t have to be rocket science. You don’t have to think of the wittiest conversation starter ever. The goal is to just get the ball rolling. Potential conversation starters include:
Hi, how are you?
Do you know what time it is?
How’s your day going?
I dig your tie/shoes/watch/etc.
Make eye contact, smile, and wait for his or her response. If it invites additional conversation, great! If not, your job is done and you can move on.
Good luck and let me know how things go!
Wednesday, learn how to publish non-fiction!
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on February 26, 2008 - 11:54 am
Got a killer book idea that’s keeping you up at night? Want to turn your expertise into a non-fiction book? Join my free webinar Wednesday night for a step-by-step journey through the book publishing process, including:
- How to write a nonfiction book proposal
- The importance of a platform
- How to find an agent
- How to attract the attention of publishers
- How to promote your book once it’s published
Here’s how to participate:
Wednesday, February 27th at 6:30pm Pacific Attend via Phone or Webcast — it’s your choice
Click here for details
If you’re passionate about your nonfiction book idea, don’t let another year go by without pursuing your dream of getting published. This is your year to bring that dream to life!
Breakup Survival Tip of the Week: Keep a recovery calendar!
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on - 7:53 am
Click the play button to hear the podcast:
Calling all breakup survivors! Whether you just got dumped, are healing from an old breakup, or are somewhere in between, this tip’s for you. I recently told you about a site called first30days.com that chronicles the first 30 days following a major life event. Well, in keeping with that theme, every day for the next 30 days I want you to mark your calendar. If you go all day and all night without contacting your ex in any way, and that includes cyber stalking his or her myspace page, driving by their house, texting them, then give yourself a gold star (or smiley face, etc.) for that day. If you break down and contact your ex, highlight that day as a setback and pledge to do better the following day. The goal is to get 30 consecutive days of gold stars on your calendar. If you can achieve that, you are well on your way to recovery. If you have setbacks, that’s okay. Just keep going. The goal is to hold yourself accountable for your healing and encourage yourself to move on. Good luck!
From the Love Guru: Does Your Man Know the REAL You?
Submitted by lovegurublaire on February 22, 2008 - 7:02 am
Does Your Man Know the REAL You?
If you’re like most women, the answer is (sadly) no. We’re brought up told to keep our mouth’s shut. To keep our feelings to ourselves. Why is this? We don’t want to scare the man away, of course. Why do you think that sharing what is true in your heart will scare away a guy? Maybe you got the “don’t scare a guy away” message from tv or film. Maybe it was something you learned from your friends. Maybe it’s something you read in a Cosmo….
“Don’t share your feelings too soon, it’ll push him away.”
“Don’t be too intense.”
“Men are like dogs, keep them on a long leash and let them shorten it.”
“Let the man express his interest in you first, then you got him!”
Why do you feel you need to “trick” a guy into liking you? or staying with you? Maybe it’s what you heard from your guy friends growing up…
“She’s crazy.”
“She wants to see me all the time.”
“I need my space.”
“I’m just using her for sex.”
Dating is not a battle of you vs. him. It’s not a game of “let me date him long enough and be good enough and satisfy him enough that he’ll want something more serious with me.”
This isn’t how it works. This fear of sharing the REAL you is not bringing you what you really want – a REAL true, deep, lasting relationship.
So if you’re feeling that you:
1) Want your relationship to be more serious
2) Want to get married to the man you’re dating
3) Want to be intimate with only him – and for him to only sleep with you
…and you keep this ALL to yourself, then the guy you’re dating is not really dating the REAL you.
It’s time to break out of your shell. It’s time to risk “it all.” It’s time to have a deep, intimate relationship where you TRUST the guy, the relationship, and KNOW where it’s stands and where it’s going.
So, go for it!
Share the REAL you with the man you’re dating, and if you don’t know how or you need some help, join me on my upcoming teleseminar.
Wishing you the best in love,
Blaire Allison
The Love Guru
Relationship Readiness Webcast Replay Now Available
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on February 19, 2008 - 10:12 pm
In case you missed last night’s webcast, you can now listen to the replay.. Here’s what we covered:
Want to find real and lasting love in 2008? First, you need to become relationship ready. My Relationship Readiness Coaching Program offers the following benefits:
- Define your relationship readiness
- Identify common dating traps
- Learn how to get out of your own way
- Identify and release scarcity issues and other dating fears
Want to get relationship ready? Take advantage of my Relationship Readiness Coaching Package featuring five individual coaching sessions for just $200. That’s a 35% savings! But act now — offer expires February 29, 2008. For more deets, email Lisa@BreakupChronicles.com.
Travel to New Territory
Submitted by Kelly Westhoff on - 9:48 am
I absolutely love this story by contributor Kelly Westhoff! Maybe it’s because it reminds me of my own solo travels following a breakup. But it also illustrates how resilient we can be after the end of a love affair when we give ourselves a chance to disappear and heal.
My boyfriend of five years tossed me to the curb. This didn’t happen recently. It happened ten years ago. Nevertheless, the memory stings.
Five years is a lot to give a relationship when you are in your early twenties. I gave those years willingly, though, as I had thought that boyfriend and I would get married, adopt a dog, buy a house, have kids – all that picturesque, American dream sort of stuff.
When that didn’t happen, I fell into a slump. I suffered more than just the broken-hearted blues. I had crafted an entire idyllic future life around that relationship and its dissolution, for me at that time, meant the disappearance of a dream. If I wasn’t going to get married in the next year and become wifey-dearest, then who was I going to be?
The only thing that made sense, my only solution, was to completely reinvent my life. To do so, I ran away. I fled to Argentina, to its capital city of Buenos Aires, and got a job teaching English. I stayed for eight months and Buenos Aires soothed me. Actually, there’s nothing “soothing†about Buenos Aires. It’s a massive, crowded, noisy, bright and caffeinated city. Maybe it would be better if I said that Buenos Aires distracted me. It distracted me from my broken heart and shattered dreams long enough for them to heal.
Solo foreign travel is, perhaps, the best breakup remedy. There is, of course, the obvious fact that it takes you far away from your lost love; however, it holds other perks. A solo trip to a new land empowers you. Perhaps you will learn how to navigate an unknown subway system, or dine alone in a room full of people, or master a handful of foreign phrases.
Granted, any or all of these things might seem scary or daunting before you take off, but for many who are suffering the broken-hearted blues, the mere thought of living a life sans THE ex is equally terrifying. One way or another, you’re going to have to conquer some fears. You might as well get a passport stamp while doing so. Yet the best thing, I think, about traveling alone in another country is that you are forced to stay connected to the real world. You can’t zone out and drift off into your secret revenge plots and romantic reunion fantasies. You can not wallow. You have to pay attention. Suddenly, flushing the toilet is a serious adventure. Those foreign knobs just aren’t in the same place you’re used to finding a flusher. Wait. How much should a bottle of water really cost? Should you have left a tip for the waiter? What was the name of your hotel’s street again?
Solo foreign travel demands that you live in the moment. And it will prove to you that you can exist in a new land. And really, when you stop to think about it, that’s exactly what your life is after a breakup – new territory. So dig out that passport and go. You don’t have to go super long and you don’t have to go super far. But you should go. And I highly recommend going alone.
Kelly’s story also reminds me of Elizabeth Gilbert’s “Eat, Pray, Love” which I’m reading right now. It’s about one woman’s post-divorce re-awakening in three different countries over the course of a year.
Getting Back in the Game pt. 2
Submitted by LJMaggie on February 17, 2008 - 8:33 am
In this installment, the game gets interesting…
After the last date I decided to try a different approach towards the next first date with someone. I posted an ad on Craigslist. Yes I know there are some weirdos on there but I was optimistic. I did meet some writer friends on there, but looking for a boyfriend on Craigslist is not really ideal. Who knows, it could work. Boy was I wrong. I posted a simple ad.
Not your typical girl
“I am not your typical girl. I like being in the snow and on the beach. BBQ and good restaurants. Local music and national acts. I can dress up for a night on the town or for a day watching the game. Just looking for a good guy that isn’t looking for sex on a first date. Someone that can have as much fun outdoors as they can indoors. I am a writer that loves music. So going to a concert or the bookstore are things I enjoy and would hope you can enjoy them with me. When you respond, tell me a bit about yourself.”
I did get a couple of responses that stood out. One guy, 35 who likes to snowboard, no psycho exes, and no baggage. He didn’t quite have baggage but a few relationship issues. We only talked online or the phone and he seemed like a decent guy until he told me that he has been cheated on in all of his past relationships. When I asked him why, he said he didn’t know because his girlfriends had everything they needed. It was a little red flag but I decided to give him a chance. We set up a date but then he got sick, and has promised that he is going to make it up to me. Soon he was telling me things online that were similar to what THE EX used to say when he was trying to impress me. Sirens, and whistles were going off in my head. Red flags were waving. And then he started asking me about my sexual experiences. Did he not read my ad. “I DON’T WANT A GUY WHO WANTS SEX ON A FIRST DATE”. Granted he wasn’t asking for sex on a first date but he was asking about my sexual past before we had even met in person. Seriously.
 Do I give this guy a chance? Or keep looking?
Stay tuned for the continuing saga…
The Couple’s Guide to Getting Fit in 2008
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on February 16, 2008 - 7:02 am
When eHarmony initially approached me to write this article, I felt a bit daunted. After all, Mr. XY and I could do a better job of motivating one another to exercise more and eat less pizza (drink less wine, have less dessert, etc.). Since writing the article, I’m happy to report we are on a healthy living kick that includes regular exercise, more fruits and vegetables in our diet, and much less sugar. Of course, that didn’t stop us from ordering pizza over the weekend and enjoying a nice bottle of wine. Still, nobody’s perfect. And in an effort to constantly improve myself and my partner, I’m taking the following article to heart.
Serious about getting fit in 2008? Now that the holidays are over (and all the goodies have been gobbled), lots of people have health and fitness on the brain — and not just their own. If you’re happily hooked up, you may have your partner’s health and fitness in mind as well. Wish he’d eat healthier? Want her to stop talking about losing 10 pounds and just do it? Regardless of what your fitness goals are this year, you’ll be better able to attain them together by following these simple and effective tips:
Tip #1: Set an Example
If you’re trying to motivate your partner to get fit, the single most important thing you can do to get started is set a healthy example. Don’t bother nagging or complaining about his or her bad habits. That may only cause resistance and/or resentment. Instead, inspire by example. Create your own healthy new habits like going to the gym every day, cutting out junk food, refraining from eating after 8 p.m., etc. In addition, start talking to your partner about the healthy habits you’re incorporating into your daily life. Share why they’re important to you, and how they make you feel strong and confident (and maybe even super sexy!). If you’re consistent with your healthy new routine, your partner will see that and most likely be inspired.
Click here to read the other for great fitness tips on eHarmony.com.
Most common reasons for breakups
Submitted by Lisa Steadman on February 15, 2008 - 7:05 am
I’ve never seen statistics before on the most common reasons people breakup, so I thought this poll conducted by InsideDivorce.com was pretty interesting…
Infidelity 42%
Abuse 34%
Boredom 29%
Lack of action in the bedroom 22%
Financial worries 22%
Alcohol or drugs 22%
Debt 17%
Career 11%
Hobbies 8%
Your own infidelity 8%
